Meet Erica aka ERocka, co-DJ of ITM Radio, CEO of G1 Magazine & creator of Femline... a line of Remixxed T's who's creating a buzz of heat! Erica is a mother of 2, wife and respected business woman who has learned how to bloom wherever and however she's planted! Her shirts are in demand and now available online as well at "Hot Rod Heidi's Vintage Closet" to those scrambling to get their own!
This guy's wife is really a true hero herself! Notice that she is the one who reminded Mr. King of how they pray for how to find things they lost and they always find it... Just check out the story!
I have plenty of girlfriends who are married. Heck, I'm married.
When things are going great in marriage there are laughs and great sex, the wife doesnt "nag" & the husband "pays attention to her needs" - with or without money. But then eventually selfish-ambitions take hold and suddenly, there isn't enough money, everyone needs their "space", and sex is a no go if too much drama ensues - at least to one of the spouses. Suddenly, your searching other "options".
As a stay-at-home mom, "working" is an understatement. "Work" is the stay at home mom's lifestyle! There are no days off. There are no breaks or lunches or "me" times (not really). Because even when the husband watches the kids for us, what happens? They wait for us to come back around in order to relieve them, leaving us wives with the messes to clean up that they allowed the kids to make for the sake of not wanting to deal with telling the kids to clean or cleaning it up themselves - she'll get it up. But heck, if you're smart you'll learn to be happy with the fact that the kids are fed, safe and maybe even clean in your husband's care.
Our children are ages 2 and 1, throw in a husband whose name is NOT Mr. Clean and loves attention and you have a recipe for possibly losing your identity!
What happens all of a sudden if the husband decides he wants another life apart from the married one? What happens to us women who have day after day dedicated our life's work of losing our own lives for the sake of others?
Now I'm no Stepford (far from) that's for sure! I struggle to cook when I feel stressed - heck I just struggle to cook! I don't do ironing. I wash clothes once I'm overwhelmed - & then they'll become a sea of snuggly soft mounds for my children to dive into for about 2 weeks . I will leave dishes in the sink for three nights straight if I can tolerate it for some rest. (I'll admit that I do try to fight for my right to be lazy at times.) I don't always feel like having sex more than 2-3 times a week (tops). My hair is married to the bun because the salon, well that's a fantasy now-a-days for me. And I don't give my children their lessons on a consistent basis (but childcare is trying to rape people at $278-ish per week per child and I'm sorry.... that's just unrealistic in today's economy.
I, the ex-model, am far (far far) away from the woman of desire in comparison to the do-it-all woman that media empresses upon our subconcious thoughts: perfect schedule, perfect career & education, strong faith, perfect style and poise, the perfect vehicle, perfect house, perfectly well behaved tots, perfectly sexual (go down whenever he wants) wife, always knowing what to say and how to say it with a big butt and a smile that shines the glory of God! And on top of all that, not need a man... well then what the heck was the man created for? Woman was not created to overshadow the man. Woman was created as man's helpmate. Every now-and-then, I have to remind myself that if God has given me a standard and yet He exercises such extreme grace when I fall short of it, how much more should I be forgiving of myself (and my hubby) when things don't fall into some picture perfect paragon.
Somthing that really gets me is that most women (who do do it all) are not being a superwoman because they like that status, it's because they have babydaddies who don't do their God given duties in the first place and so the ladies are really FORCED to look the part. My mother had to be one of those women because she had a man (my handsome daddy) that wanted to live more for himself and was too immature to understand the structuring and wisdom in family (at that time). If men really understood what the family structure is... Men focus on their work family more than the one at home, [some] never realizing that the family is not a burden. It is meant to be a finely tuned machine for the purpose of progression of God's kingdom, society, charity, the economy, and as the ultimate demonstration of love. Instead we do everything in our power to stray away from that center. We look at family as a ground zero rather than a sanctuary and school.
And so what do I do? A little part time job, sell [FaBuLOUS] jewelry and my Snooze N Go... The house stuff of course, the Momma thing; no doubt (gotta love it)... but to most now a days it isn't enough. I have to work to help pay bills and still work full time at home while trying to make my hobbies my day job - without breaks with the possibility of losing a marriage; because in the midst of motherhood we may lose ourself? So what happens if that husband decides to leave and leave you to fend financially for yourself? What then?And though it may not seem a tough job to many, it is a serious mental & sometimes physical battle, especially with toddlers - and sure enough the husband doesn't want to do it! That alone should be worth the reward and respect. It would be nice to hear rap & r&b songs that applaud the woman who is determined to have a healthy home (spiritually, emotionally, financially & physically) even if it means that she is simply put, a Homemaker.
But the problem is that motherhood is not flashy. It's not self-seeking, it's not prideful, it's not rude or quite ambitious. It's routine, it's patient, it protects, it's full of hope, it perseveres, and adores truth! And oh... a main thing... it makes no money. But you know what they say: the one with the money rules, right? This world and it's sick mentality has it's priorities all mixed up! That's a trip because my justification has to come from the sweet appreciation the Lord shows me and from the goals I steadily lock in to achieve - knowing that my reward is in the future of my babies and in the Lord Almighty. Or else, there is no pat on the back. I can't wait until mother's day. I would truly like to treat my mother this year.
How often the TRUE roles of the wife and mom are underappreciated.
So to ALL the mommies (seemingly good & not so good), you are not alone! And if no one else appreciates the time, energy and work you live to put in, God does - I mean just look at how underappreciated He is!
